Friday, September 25, 2015

Green Smoke Review

If you want the real scoop, you need to read this Green Smoke electronic cigarette review and find out if the performance matches all the hype.  Bear in mind that when we review a product, we compare it to the best and not to the cheap models that you find in most retail stores.  If any brand wants to be the best e cigarette, then it gets measured against the best.  Our ratings demand high standards.  If we say that something is excellent, then you can be sure that it is.  Let’s get started.

Green Smoke enjoys a sterling reputation in the industry.  We are always wary of such reputations.  How many times in life does reality measure up to the hype?  Not very often as we all know.  Still, we are strait reviewers and we began testing with an open mind.  A mere 3 days into testing it quickly became obvious, the reality matches the hype!  Green Smoke may have an earthy name but its performance is out of this world.

Green Smoke’s packaging is very attractive and simple.  We were also impressed with the quick shipping service.  Ordering your Green Smoke ecigs is very easy thanks to a very user friendly website.  Our UX specialists gave rave reviews of the website.  You have to see it for yourself.  The site is always updated, carries seasonal themes and promotions and is actually fun to navigate.  We ordered a sampling of Green Smoke products in order to test their entire catalog.

The Green Smoke models are very easy to assemble.  Assembly involves screwing the Flavor Max cartridge onto the battery and that’s it.  Assembly is finished!  In fact, when you assemble the e-cig, you cannot help but notice the quality of the craftsmanship.  It literally puts itself together.  Once the cartridge is attached to the battery, you are ready to enjoy.  And enjoy you will.

Green Smoke provides a satisfying burst of vapor and flavor from the very first puff.  The performance is very consistent throughout the life of the cartridge and the battery.  If you are a light, medium or heavy smoker, you will be amazed at how similar the experience is to smoking.  Throughout every category of testing, Green Smoke set the bar for every other brand.  This is not your everyday e cigarette.  We fully recommend Green Smoke.

Green Smoke Batteries

Green Smoke’s battery performance may be the very best in the business.  They are compact enough that they are easy to handle, in fact they feel very much like a genuine cigarette, yet they are powerful enough to deliver enough voltage to always provide you with a ton of vapor.  The batteries are attractive, powerful and thirdly and perhaps most importantly, they are very consistent.  You don’t have to worry about there being a ton of vapor on one puff and then hardly anything on the next puff.  Every puff is just as good as the last.  And speaking of lasting, these batteries outlast the competition hands down.

A fully charged Green Smoke battery will provide the equivalent of in the area of 2 full packs of tobacco cigarettes.  That means that one fully charged battery could last you 2 full days, depending on your usage of course.

Beyond performance, Green Smoke is not without consideration for style.  You can choose a style that matches your personality.  There are different patterns and designs available.  Just visit the Green Smoke website and you can easily navigate to the page where you will be able to see all of the battery options.

Extra batteries are available from Green Smoke for only $19.97.  You can buy a 3-pack of batteries for $49.97.  You can also get yourself a USB cigarette.  A USB cigarette is also known as a pass through and works by plugging into a USB port.  Then you can vape directly from the power provided by your computer in the comfort of your home.

Flavormax Cartridges
Green Smoke’s green image is essential to its brand.  The company does not take that image or its environmental responsibility lightly.  Of course the initial contribution of vaping to a batter environment is obvious.  Tobacco put thousands of toxic chemicals into the air while an ecig emits vapor.  No contest there when considering environmental impact.  And now Green Smoke is taking its commitment to another level by introducing a cartridge-recycling plan in an effort to further reduce waste.  This plan has obvious appeal and helps each of us further reduce our carbon footprints.

Flavormax cartridges, also known as cartomizers, are amazing.  That may sound over the top or like a sales pitch but at the end of the day it is simply the truth.  Each cartridge delivers pitch perfect flavor and vapor with each puff.  The flavors are excellent and the vapor is very satisfying.  Best of all, it lasts and lasts.  Each cartridge lasts for almost 300 puffs.  Think about that - that is like a pack and a half of tobacco cigarettes.  Flavor Max cartridges have set a very high standard for the competition to try and match.

Cartridges are available in 4 different flavors and 5 different nicotine levels.  The flavors are all tobacco related and taste excellent.  The menthol flavor and tobacco flavors all excelled in terms of flavor.  Every cartridge performed exactly like the last.  The consistency in manufacturing is remarkable.

A 5 pack of cartridges sells for $16.97 which seems like it is much more expensive than other brands but bear in mind that 5 Green Smoke cartridges are the same as 7 or 8 cartridges of other leading brands.  It is also many times cheaper than tobacco.

You can always save more money by ordering larger quantities.  You can pick up 20 cartridges for $59.97, that is 4 x 5-packs.  That saves you $8 versus buying single 5-packs.  You can decide to buy 8 x 5-packs, that is 40 cartridges, for $109.97 or you can buy 12 x 5-packs of cartridges for $159.97.  That is 60 cartridges or might want to really save and stock up by buying 16 x 5-packs of cartridges for $212.97.  That is 80 cartridges!  With that order, you also receive 2 free batteries.

Starter Kits
Green Smoke has 5 different starter kits to choose from.  Starter kits are a great way to get everything you need to make the switch to ecigs while saving money.  Instead of buying each component separately, you can get a kit that has it all.

Green Smoke Ultimate Starter Kit

The Ultimate Kit comes with 3 batteries, battery chargers for your computer or electrical outlets, 2 carrying cases and 2 packs of Flavormax cartridges.  You also get a pass-through ecig that you can use at home anytime and not rely on your batteries.  This is the kit that we recommend the most.  Many people want to buy a lesser-equipped kit to try out the product first before committing to more, but this is a top quality brand and we believe that you will love it from the very beginning.  You get all of this for $129.97.

Love Birds Kit

The Love Birds Kit is a fantastic option for households with more than 1 smoker.  It comes with 4 batteries, 2 carry cases, 2 pass through ecigs, and 4 packs of cartridges.  This is a great deal at $169.97.

Pro Kit

The Pro Kit is a very popular choice.  It comes with 2 batteries, 3 chargers, including a car charger, a carry case, pass through e cig and  2 packs of cartridges.  It sells for $99.97 and is truly a very good value.

Express Kit

The Express Kit comes with 1 battery, a USB and wall charger, carry case and 1 pack of cartridges.  It also comes with a pass through ecig and sell for $59.97 making it a very good buy.

Essentials Kit

The Essentials Kit is a bare bones kit that allows you to sample Green Smoke at a bottom dollar price.  The kit sells for only $29.99 and comes with a battery, a charger and 2 single cartridges.


Along with all of these starter kits, you can also buy replacement chargers, accessories and more from the website.  You can pick up a replacement charger for as low as $14.97.  Once again we have to mention that the shopping experience provided by the website is second to none as is the customer service.
Warranty

Green Smoke offers a 30-day money back guarantee as well as a lifetime warranty.  See the company website for details.


V2 Cigs E-Cig Review

Our V2 e cig reviews provide you with an honest, unbiased appraisal of a popular choice for vapers.  V2 ranks among the most widely known in the industry but are the really good choice or just good marketing?  You have come to the right place for electric cigarette brands info.  In this article we will be reviewing a range of V2 products beginning with a general overview of the performance of this popular electronic cigarette.

More and more people have tried e cigarettes and for many the experience has been less than positive.  The problem has been that many people’s first vaping experience is based on using a cheap model that they picked up at a gas station.  You have to understand that in an emerging market place, many models and styles have been thrown together in an effort to capitalize on your curiosity.  Unfortunately, you do not get a genuine experience from the cheaper, disposable models.

Our review is concerned with rating V2 in comparison to proven, quality brands and we can begin by assuring you that there is a night and day difference between V2 and a cheap disposable.  This is the easy part of the review; V2 performs better in every way than the overwhelming majority of cheap models you find in many convenience stores and gas stations.  The vapor production is far superior and the satisfaction level is light years ahead.  That being said, let’s see how V2 compares to the best electric cigarette brands.

To begin, V2 uses a very simple 2-piece design that is very easy to assemble and use.  You screw the cartridge, better known as a cartomizer, to the battery and begin puffing!  Now when we rate an ecig we consider the quantity of vapor, the flavor and how consistent the ecig performs from one puff to the next.  The very first puff on a V2 provides an excellent amount of vapor.  The sensation from the vapor feels a lot like a drag on a traditional tobacco cig.  The flavor is also very good.

Okay, so we know that the first puff is good now how about the next several hundred puffs?  In testing, we learned that V2 provides a consistent amount of vapor and flavor from the first puff up until puff 180 – 200.  This is a very good performance.  For your own reference, 200 puffs are roughly the same as a pack of regular cigarettes.  So, one cartridge is roughly the same as one pack of tobacco smokes.  Again, this is very good and falls into the statistical performances of the other top brands.

We tried each of the 10 flavors available and the V2 Red proved to be very popular with our staff.  Of course there are menthol and other flavors that were all quite good as well.  Flavor is a personal choice; of course, our concerns are whether or not the flavor is detectable and good quality.  Every V2 flavor passes the test in this regard.

V2 Ecig Batteries
V2’s battery performance has improved as the company has evolved.  In fact, a fully charged battery should last a moderate vaper an entire day and well into the evening.  Still, we recommend moderate vapers and heavier users to buy a starter kit with more than 1 battery.  Beyond the very good battery performance, the batteries also charge very quickly and easily.  The starter kits have everything you need to get started.

V2 Flavor Cartridge Cartomizers
V2 flavor cartridges are very well designed and provide you with consistent vapor production and smooth flavors.  The flavor options are:
V2 Red
Sahara
Congress
Menthol
Peppermint
Mint Tea
Cherry
Coffee
Vanilla
V2 Cola

Along with the 10 flavors there are also 6 different nicotine options to choose from.  Many companies offer far fewer nicotine options.

Flavor cartridges sell for $9.95 for a pack of 5.  A 5 pack is the same as 5 packs of tobacco cigs so you can see the savings.  If you buy larger quanitites you can receive discounted prices.

A 20 pack of cartridges sells for $34.95, a 40 pack sells for $64.95, a pack of 80 is available for $119.95 and a 100 count pack sells for $225.  It is well worth your while to buy larger quantities.  If you would like to try a variety of flavors before deciding which one that you like best try a 10 flavor sample pack for $16.95.  The sample pack lets you try every flavor and is a great choice if you are a new V2 customer.

If you like more flavor options, check out our Mt Baker Vapor coupon code.

Starter Kits

Electronic cigarette starter kits generally come with a battery, a charger and cartridges.  Everything you need.  The more advanced starter kits most often come with more options and more cartridges at discounted prices.

V2 Ultimate Kit - $149.95

V2 has six different starter kits to choose from.  The Ultimate Starter Kit comes with 3 batteries, a USB charger, a wall charger, and a car charger.  It also comes with a portable charger pack that lets you charge your batteries on the go.  The portable charger is similar in size to a pack of cigarettes and is very convenient to carry around with you.  The Ultimate Kit also comes with a pas through power cig that attaches to a USB port and allows you to vape without using your batteries.  It also comes with a carry case and 25 flavor cartridges.  That’s the same as 25 packs of cigs which would cost you $150 alone.  The V2 Ultimate Kit costs $149.95 and comes with all of the above so the value is obvious.

V2 Couples Kit - $114.95

The V2 couples kit comes with everything a home with 2 smokers will need to make the switch to vaping.  The kit comes with 4 batteries, 20 flavor cartridges, 2 wall chargers and 2 smart chargers.

V2 Standard Plus Kit - $99.95

The Standard Plus Kit is a great choice to get everything you need, including a portable charger case, and spend less than $100.  It is a great deal.  You get 2 batteries, a wall charger, a smart charger and a portable charger case.  You also get 10 flavor cartridges to get you started.

V2 Standard Kit - $59.95

The Standard Kit is a great low cost option that still includes everything you need including 2 batteries.  You also get a wall and smart charger along with a compliment of 10 flavor cartridges, which is the same as $60 in tobacco.  The standard kit is clearly a fantastic deal.

Beginners Kit - $34.95

The beginners kit comes with 1 battery, 6 cartridges and a charger.  It also comes with a bonus item, namely a V2 disposable ecig!  V2 disposables are among the best disposables available.  This kit allows you to sample a disposable while still getting the benefit of a rechargeable.

V2 Power Cig Kit - $24.95

This kit comes with a power cig, commonly known as a pass through.  The power cig plugs directly into a USB port as opposed to a battery operate electric cigarette.  The kit also comes with 5 flavor cartridges.

Ex Series

Recently, V2 introduced a new line of ecig they named the Ex Series.  The Ex Series offer a more powerful, long lasting battery and a sleek new look.  More power means more vapor!  Ex Batteries are available for $29.95

V2 Warranty

V2 customers benefit from a lifetime warranty against defective parts.  As long as you have ordered cartridges within 90 days, your V2 Cigs are protected by one of the best warranties in the business.

Friday, September 4, 2015

More Doctors Are Recommending Ecigs To Patients

A medical doctor working out of a surgical practice in Ilkseston, Derbyshire has opened a vape store right next to his medical practice. The store, called Dr. Smokeless, has attracted a lot of attention and an increasing amount of business.

More and more people are using e-cigarette as a smoking alternative. Many in the medical profession have railed against e-cigarettes. The lab coat crowd has sited obscure findings in old studies to make overblown claims about the dangers off e-cigs. In the meantime, their patients continue to use tobacco.

Dr. Ashcroft, a GP, has a much different view. Every day in the UK 120 people are diagnosed with lung cancer. Tobacco is a serious health issue that is costing too many lives. Dr. Ashcroft sees the benefit of substituting vaping for smoking.

“What a lot of people don’t know is that it’s not the nicotine that is bad for you, it is the tar and carbon monoxide.”  Dr. Ashcroft went on to explain, “Vaporizing is a dramatically safer way of taking nicotine.”

Dr. Ashcroft and others in the medical field may seem like unlikely e-cigarette retailers but the fact remains that more and more the medical profession is coming to realize that there is a benefit to anything that gets people away from tobacco.

The vape shop in Ilkeston has seen a steady flow of business. Dr. Ashcroft has seen that vaping is catching on and he actively encourages patients to vape rather than smoke.

E-cigarettes use safer ingredients than tobacco and do not contain the carcinogens that are found in tobacco. E-cigarette retailers and vape store owners in the UK have seen tremendous growth in the last year. Acceptance is growing in spite of fear campaigns launched by opponents.

The Dr. Smokeless vape shop is proof positive that acceptance is not finding its way into the medical profession. Dr. Ashcroft wants all smokers to make the switch.

If you have had any conversations with your doctor about vaping and are willing to share, please leave a comment below.


Monday, May 13, 2013

Quick Post

This is a quick post.  So far, it has taken me 15 seconds to get this far.  Moving on.  Prairie Clarity will once again be your source for everything.  That's right, everything except puppy recipes.  Other than that, you will find it here.  The best way to scratch lotto ticket .... 3 times up, 3 times down, and 4 side to side maneuvers.  Done,  Now you know. 

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Web Content Samples

Web Content Writing Samples of Matt McConnell
These pages are optimized to appear higher on search engine rankings. I understand SEO and the successful format for assisting clients in marketing their services.

San Jose Estate Planning Attorney
Corporations (C-Corp/S-Corp)
In California, a corporation is basically considered to be a legal entity which exists separately from its owners. With a C corporation, owners are generally free from personal liability, but taxes are levied on both owners and the corporation. C corporations may have the option to sell stocks or bonds internationally and the increased capital will carry on beyond the death of current ownership. On the other hand, S corporations are pass through tax entities meaning that no income tax is paid at the corporate level rather any profits or losses are passed through the corporation and passed on to the individual tax returns of the owners. S corporation may have shareholders but no more than 100 and all shareholders must be US residents or US citizens. The laws applying to both C corporations and S corporations are complicated. We can help.

Establishing either an S or C corporation can have benefits and you can still develop a succession plan that suits your future goals with the help of an experienced San Jose estate planning lawyer. If you have future intentions of selling your business or passing it on to your family, choosing an appropriate business entity will be of crucial importance. At WealthPLAN, our knowledgeable legal team will provide the attentive personal service you deserve. We will take the time to work with you so that we understand your specific goals and your vision. Our team will thoroughly analyze your position so that we can fully explain all of your choices. We are committed to assisting you in achieving your goals and ensuring that your business provides for your family both now and in the future.

Estate Planning Lawyer in San Jose
Planning for the future of your estate is important and we can help you develop a plan to pass on your wealth in a smooth and tax-efficient manner. Our attorneys are committed to not only helping your family after you are gone, but helping you now. We want to build a relationship with you and your family that will extend to future generations. We care about the legacy of your family. We may be able to assist you in developing a strategy that will enhance your wealth now and for the future.
Contact a San Jose estate planning attorney to help you determine if an S corporation or C corporation suits your goals.

Page: Criminal Defense
Overland Park Criminal Defense Lawyer

Criminal Defense
Being charged with a criminal offense is a stressful and intimidating experience that can impact you for the rest of your life. An accusation alone can affect your job, your relationships with friends and family as well as your reputation in the community. In fact, according to the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale, being charged and convicted of a crime is one of the top 5 most stressful events a human being can endure. Adding to the stress, conviction rates in Kansas have increased dramatically in the last five years. The police and prosecution are more aggressive than ever when it comes to pursuing harsh penalties for those accused of a crime. If you have been charged or are under investigation, it is vital that you contact a knowledgeable Overland Park criminal defense attorney right away. The police and prosecution will waste no time in building the strongest possible case against you. At the Gigstad Law Office, LLC, we will waste no time in making sure that your rights are aggressively protected. We are prepared to fight for you when you have been charged with a criminal offense including:
· DUI
· Drug Crimes
· Possession
· Theft Crimes
· Domestic Violence
· Juvenile Crimes
· Misdemeanor Offences
· Traffic Offenses
At our insightful and resourceful firm, we will methodically investigate your case to help you to determine your optimal legal choices. We have the proven ability to steadfastly defend you while at the same time skillfully negotiating with the prosecution seeking a reduced charge or a dismissal. We are committed to achieving the best possible result for you. Our commitment to excellence begins with your free initial consultation and does not end until your matter is resolved. Our firm will utilize all available resources to defend you and to obtain the most favorable possible result.

Criminal Defense Attorney Proudly Serving Overland Park, Leawood, Lenexa, Prairie Village, Mission Hills, Olathe, Mission, Shawnee, Merriam, Roeland Park, and Kansas City, Kansas

If you have been charged with a crime, you may find that friends and colleagues, potentially even family, do not look at you quite the same way. A mere accusation can tarnish your reputation and a conviction can affect the rest of your life. Our firm understands what you are going through. We understand that sometimes good people make mistakes and we are also very aware that innocent people are frequently accused of crimes they had nothing to do with. At our firm, you will be treated with the dignity and respect that you deserve. We will work side by side with you to develop an optimal defense strategy to tenaciously protect your rights and your future. Every client and every case is important to us. With our confident and determined firm standing by you, you can count on integrity, commitment and results.

Contact an Overland Park criminal defense lawyer from our professional firm without delay to work with you to develop a strategically effective defense against criminal charges. Our knowledgeable legal team will tirelessly pursue optimum results in your case.

Los Angeles Work Permits Attorney

Work Permits and Work Visas
It’s a small world. We have all heard that phrase used repeatedly. Nowhere are those words truer than in the world of business. The economy is truly global as well as being very competitive and in order to succeed American companies recruit the best and the brightest from around the world. Whatever your field of business may be, a resourceful and dedicated Los Angeles immigration lawyer from our highly capable firm may be able to help you. We are very well-versed in immigration procedures and we will work hard to assist you in fulfilling your personnel needs with the skilled workers you need to give your business a competitive edge.
If you are petitioning for a green card on behalf of a skilled worker, there EB1 through EB5 visas may be an option if the foreign national in question is able to meet and prove outstanding skills in their respective field. If your petition for a foreign worker is temporary in nature then you may have several options depending on the circumstances. Some of those options may be:
· H-1B Specialty Occupation
· H2B Temporary Worker
· H-3 Trainee
· L-1 Intercompany Transfer
· O-1 Alien with Extraordinary Ability
· P1, P2 or P3 for Artists, Athletes and Entertainers
· R-1 Religious Worker
The Law Offices of Carlos R. Barrios and Associates, PLC can work with you to help you determine if there is a work visa option that suits your specific needs. In many cases, the type of business and the skill level of the job in question determine which visa you need. We will vigorously pursue optimal results for you.

Seeking a work permit or work visa?
A successful petition for a work visa can be a complicated and time consuming process. We can help. Our firm understands the documentation required and we can ensure that all filing deadlines are met. Our resourceful lawyers pay very careful attention to each and every detail throughout every step of the process. We may be able to assist you in successfully petitioning for the work permit you need.

Contact a Los Angeles work permit attorney from our dedicated legal team to help you with the complicated work visa petition process.

Causes of Car Accidents

New York Personal Injury Lawyer
Since the first car accident fatality in 1896, society has developed traffic laws and regulations in an effort to keep our roads safe and avoid car accidents. Despite the laws and safety measures that have evolved over the last century, it is estimated that a total of 25 million people have lost their lives to automobile accidents world-wide since that first unfortunate accident. Today, despite vehicles featuring high-tech safety measures, fatal accidents continue to increase in frequency. With heavy traffic and more distractions than ever, it is increasingly important that we all take care on the roads we all share. When a car accident affects your life, the trauma and financial burdens can take a dramatic toll on your life. We may be able to offer the help you desperately need. At Hecht Kleeger Pintel & Damashek, our firm was created by attorneys who have enjoyed success at the largest and most profitable firms in New York. Our goal is to provide the personal attention that larger firms do not. When you contact a New York personal injury attorney from our firm, you can be assured that we will provide the personal attention you need to get you through the trauma of a car accident. In addition, our firm is dedicated to ensuring that you receive the highest possible cash award or settlement offer.

Common Causes of Car Accidents
According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, the most common causes of car collisions and accidents can be traced to the actions of drivers themselves. The following are listed as the top six causes:
· Drivers who are distracted by scenery, talking on cell phones, or, more increasingly, texting. Driver distraction is estimated to be the chief cause of 25% to 50% of all accidents.
· Driving while tired.
· Driving while under the influence.
· Speeding.
· Aggressive driving or driving while enraged.
· Weather conditions such as ice or fog.
As demonstrated above, driver negligence is at the core of the vast majority of vehicle accidents. The experienced, caring and skilled attorneys at our firm have more than 60 years of combined experience helping accident victims. When you have been involved in a car accident, we will stand up for you.

Contact a New York personal injury lawyer from our firm to help you when you have been involved in a car accident.

Hockey at its best, played to a stage of hundreds in a small town near you.

This is a random sample of one of my sports articles that appeared in a local paper in Lumsden, Sk. My articles were well received and informative. I believe that the style is unique, there is no formula traceable to institutionalized molding.

Lumsden Defeats Semans 6-5 in Dramatic Showdown

While a cold Friday night in the midst of an old-fashioned January deep freeze might signal an evening on the couch to most, the Lumsden Arena was fever pitched serving as host to a barn burning display of fireworks, red-hot saves and a final shoot-out scene John Wayne himself would have loved. Though the event in question was a clash between the Highway Hockey League’s Lumsden Monarchs and Semans Wheat Kings as opposed to a Western movie struggle between posses and outlaws, the Duke does have a place in hockey lore starring in Idol of the Crowds in 1937. Despite the long history between hockey and Hollywood, screenwriters would be hard pressed to come up with a script that could match Friday night’s game in Lumsden. The game even featured a classic improbable hero, the Monarch’s special teams.

The tempo was set early as Semans opened the scoring less than two minutes into the first period as Kellen Sillinger notched his seventh goal. The former Melville Millionaire kick started a night in which he and his linemates would record an impressive four points apiece. Still early in the first period, Lumsden’s Tyson Getzinger took advantage of a neutral zone turnover scoring his fourth goal of the season beating Seman’s goalie Colin Munroe, who briefly had the puck in his trapper before it ultimately eluded him. Munroe would later make amends as he went on to enjoy a solid outing making 41 saves. Monarch’s goaltender Trevor Thiessen, who saved his best work for his close-up in the final scene, was also strong making 36 saves.

Just 30 seconds into the second period and short-handed, Lumsden took a 2 – 1 lead as Jeff Harris set up Battlefords Northstars alum Jesse Matlock. It was the first short-handed goal Semans had surrendered this season. That momentum was short lived as 3 minutes later the Line of Sillinger, Jared Molnar and Darren Lynch were firing on all cylinders first knotting the game at 2 and then Lynch, who scored over 200 points in his WHL career, fired the go ahead marker at 7:33 of the second. Semans then went ahead 4 – 2 as Derek Parker notched his sixth. Parker opportunistically joined the rush after serving the second of his 4 penalties. No stranger to the penalty box, Parker had 268 penalty minutes as a 16 year-old rookie in the WHL and went on to log a villainous pair of 500 plus PIM seasons as a pro. Reggie Dunlop would be proud!

Despite surrendering 3 consecutive goals, the Monarchs began finding their rhythm. Chipping away at the Wheat King’s momentum, the Monarchs utilized their speed to create rushes off of turn-overs. The effort paid off as late in the second Lumsden drew within a goal when Austin Preete scored with assists going to Dustin Gutwin and Jeff Lawson. That goal came just six seconds after another impressive Monarch penalty kill. Lumsden’s special teams have struggled this season. The Monarchs sit last in the league in power play efficiency and second last in penalty killing. Tonight, however, was a different story. The PK had already scored the first short-handed goal Semans had surrendered all year and followed that up by creating the chance for Preete’s goal. As impressive and improbable as it may have been, the best was still to come for the Monarch’s penalty killers.

Lumsden took advantage of its late second period momentum scoring just 14 seconds into the third and tying the game at 4. The tying goal was set up by Brady Aulie, who is better known for his exploits on the football field with the U of R Rams, but tonight the football star set up former LaRonge Ice Wolves forward Tyson Getzinger for his second of the night. The furious back and forth battle continued as the Wheat Kings once again took a one goal lead when Jared Molnar scored his second of the game and 17th of the season. There were a total of 30 shots on goal in the third period as both goalies made many spotlight stealing saves. Lumsden was assessed two late penalties giving Semans a golden opportunity to put the game away. As the clock wound down to the final 2 minutes, the Monarchs found themselves in the unenviable position of trailing 5-4 while fending off a two-man advantage. Goldfinger could not have put James Bond into a more daunting predicament. But tonight belonged to the Monarchs penalty kill. Led by Jeff Lawson, an accomplished veteran of the junior, senior and university ranks, the PK not only held off the 5 on 3, they once again used their speed to create offense. As the first of the two penalties expired and with only one minute and 45 seconds left in regulation time, Lawson scored the tying goal with a pin-point shot on a great feed from Jesse Matlock. Harris also assisted, his second of the game. It was the Monarchs second short-handed goal of the night, and only the second short-handed goal scored against Semans in 2010-2011.

A hectic five minute 4 on 4 overtime ensued with quality chances for both sides but no results for either team. The game went to a shoot out. The Highway Hockey League shoot-out format is the same format used by the NHL. Each team selects 3 players. If no winner is determined after 3 rounds, additional players shoot one by one until a winner emerges. Semans selected Sillinger, Lynch and Molnar to shoot. Each of Semans gunslingers had registered 4 point nights and were clearly dangerous. Lumsden’s first shooter, Stuart Poulin, scored tucking one under Munroe. It was all the Monarchs would need. Thiessen was clutch denying all three of Semans high-powered shooters giving Lumsden a 6-5 win. The Monarchs had a great team effort and converted improbable situations into possibilities. Could have been a movie.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Fret Not Zombies

When a comet comes too close to our blue planet
Scientists aim scopes and eyes at sky hoping to scan it
In the inevitable cloud of cosmic micro-dust
Is a formula that unleashes zombie blood lust
For days after we rid ourselves of the scourge
We beergratulate each other for a successful purge
But, wait, just a mo, a sec, wait eine minuten
Maybe we should think before we start shootin
Zombies never hurt anyone, they are just uncouth
If we open our minds, we just might see the truth

For far, far too long humanity has engaged in a protracted and destructive vendetta toward zombies. We observe the zombies laboured peregrinations with steadfast mistrust largely due to our own conditioned response to the unfamiliar. We instantly access an excessively limited conclusion base with rapid, negative assessment. While the genuine vile can easily placate our fears with casual smarm, our collective disdain is reserved for zombies. We hear their weird cacophony “brains” and assume ill intent. Hollywood movies, which control so much of how we think, have long depicted zombies as completely malevolent, ghastly ghouls driven by nothing more than blood lust. Ladies and gentlemen, we have made a grave error.

Celebrated anthropologist Dr. Carver Epitaph, renown for his knowledge and large nose pores, wrote in a recent volume of the New England Journal of Anthropology and Cookware, that in the nether regions of Purgatory the language spoken is Aramaic. Those deferred to Purgatory are absorbed into a realm amid an ancient language and custom. Imagine, all of a sudden, a rogue comet comes into contact with Earth’s atmosphere with the inevitable consequence of Purgatory denizens traumatically returned to their corporeal haunts. Of course they will emerge from the earth. Upon exposure to elements, skin aggravation becomes painful. Zombies are not malicious, they are in pain.

The word ”brains” in Aramaic means goat. Anyone who has seen the passion of the Christ knows that (thanks Mel Gibson, we get you, and we thank you). When they cry “brains”, zombies are begging for goats. Goat’s milk is a noted topical soother for aggravated skin. Certainly, someone who has spent several years devoid of sun, buried underground in a dry environment can be forgiven for having skin aggravation. Surely we can be tolerant enough to understand that. Or can we? Dare we venture beyond limited perception and discover something actual? It is not our nature to do so. Until such time, until we can open our minds, until Hollywood better depicts the noble zombie, until Mel Gibson gets involved, until then zombies will bear the brunt of human scorn.

Sure, perhaps zombies, removed from terrestrial custom, could better express themselves on the corporeal plain, but can we not extend at least a standard level of tolerance toward them? We allow mistakes daily, do we expect perfection from zombies? Must a mistake lead to a zombie’s unqualified relegation? Have we ever asked if we can be of assistance to the roving zombie? No, we simply shoot and run. We must try understanding. Next time you see a zombie, ask it how its day is going. Comment on a popular local sports team. Suggest ways in which said team could be vastly improved. Comment on the weather. Reach out to zombies. Offer some goat’s milk. Suggest aloe. We can end the misunderstanding between man and zombie. Then there will be a new level of enlightenment. And the children will hold hands and sing hallelujah. Hollywood will then have to find a new villain. A more deserving villain, like mummies. Mummies, now there’s a scourge, what with their wasteful use of gauze. Have they not heard of Kyoto?